WOMEN have strengths that amaze men. They carry children, they carry
hardships, they carry burdens, but they hold happiness, love and joy.
They smile when they want to scream. They sing when they want to cry.
They cry when they are happy and laugh when they are nervous.
WOMEN wait by the phone for a "safe at home call" from a friend or
relative after a long way drive home.
WOMEN have special qualities about them. They volunteer for good
causes.
They are pink ladies in hospitals, they bring food to shut ins.
they are childcare workers, executives, attorneys, stay-at-home moms,
biker babes and your neighbors. They wear suits, jeans, and they wear
uniforms.
They fight for what they believe in. They stand up for injustice.
They are in the front row at PTA meetings. They vote for the person
that will do the best job for family issues.
WOMEN walk and talk the extra mile to get their children in the right
schools and for getting their family the right health care.
They write to the editor, their congressmen and to the "powers that be" for things that make for a better life. They don't take "no" for an answer when they believe there is a better solution.
WOMEN stick a love note in their husband's lunch box. They do without
new shoes so their children can have them. They go to the doctor with a
frightened friend.
They love unconditionally.
WOMEN are honest, loyal, and forgiving they are smart, knowing that knowledge is power; but they still know how to use their softer side to make a point.
WOMEN want to be the best for their family, their friends, and themselves.
They cry when their children excel and cheer when their friends get awards.
They are happy (or cry) when they hear about a birth or a new marriage.
Their hearts break when a friend dies. They have sorrow at the loss of
a family member, yet they are strong when they think there is no
strength left.
A WOMAN'S touch can cure any ailment. They know that a hug and a kiss
can heal a broken heart. She can make a romantic evening unforgettable.
WOMEN come in all sizes, in all colors and shapes. They live in homes,
apartments and cabins. They drive, fly, walk, run or e-mail you to
show how much they care about you. The heart of a woman
is what makes the world spin!
WOMEN do more than just give birth. They bring joy and hope. They give
compassion and ideals. They give moral support to their family and
friends.
And all they want back is a hug, a smile and for you to do the same to
people you come in contact with. Women have a lot to say and a lot to
give.
Friday, March 13, 2009
Salvaging A Lost Cause, is there a hope for reconciliation?
Love Rules. You are on the verge of breaking up, but you know you both still really love each other. While there is not much hope left of salvaging the relationship, you sometimes find yourself thinking about how much you would like to start again. The trouble is you have no idea how to start, or even if it is possible.
If the above scenario sounds familiar, then how did it go so wrong? By now you know that there is a lot of resentment between you, but how did you both let it get so far? Everyone makes mistakes and has done things that they regret. The problem is that once you start making mistakes and doing things wrong, the natural inclination is to cover your tracks.
Dishonesty and lies lead to feelings of guilt and resentment. Feelings of guilt and resentment lead to more lies and arguments. Once you start to get sucked in, this vicious circle kicks in and the lies and arguments start to build on each other. Pretty soon you start justifying your actions. How? By blaming your partner: they don't understand you, they are too snippy and argumentative, and they don't love you anymore. When this happens on both sides of the relationship, you are on a fast track to a breakup or divorce.
In order to turn this around, it is going to take a lot of soul-searching and communication. You have to rebuild the trust between the two of you and let your partner know without a doubt that you love them and are willing to take responsibility for your actions. Even if the relationship cannot be completely salvaged, you will at least make the breakup easier on both of you.
The first thing to do is to realize that there was a time when you really loved each other. Think back to how you felt when you first met or first realized that you had romantic feelings for your partner. Try to go back and actually re-experience those feelings. How your heart skipped a beat whenever you saw them or even thought of them. Think of some of the really good times you had together, when you were happy. Realize that at one stage there really was something special between the two of you and it is at least worth trying to salvage the relationship.
Next, really take a look at all the things you did wrong. Don't fall into the trap of blaming your partner for everything, you played a big part in it too, and at this stage you really need to concentrate only on your actions. It would be a great idea to get a sheet of paper and right everything down. The point of this excercise is to release some of the guilt and resentment you feel towards your partner. In order for it to work, you have to come clean - at least to yourself!
Thirdly, write a letter to your love. Explain to them that you are really sorry about the way things turned out and that you realize that you have had a huge part to play in the fact that the relationship turned sour. Talk about how you felt when you first fell in love and remind them of all the great things that have happened to you while you have been together. In order for them to trust your sincerity, however, you are probably going to have to tell them some of the things you have done that you are ashamed of. The important thing is to take responsibility for your actions, let your partner know how how you feel about them and make sure you tell them that you would really like the chance to make it up to them. Invite them on a special date, for just the two of you, so you can sit down together and clear the air, and at the very least, part as friends.
Once you have completed the above, it is really up to the two of you to sit down and discuss things to see if you have a future together. Don't try to rush things, as trust can take time to build again. But, if you at least come clean about how you feel and make an appeal to your partner's heart, you have a better chance of making it than if you didn't.
If the above scenario sounds familiar, then how did it go so wrong? By now you know that there is a lot of resentment between you, but how did you both let it get so far? Everyone makes mistakes and has done things that they regret. The problem is that once you start making mistakes and doing things wrong, the natural inclination is to cover your tracks.
Dishonesty and lies lead to feelings of guilt and resentment. Feelings of guilt and resentment lead to more lies and arguments. Once you start to get sucked in, this vicious circle kicks in and the lies and arguments start to build on each other. Pretty soon you start justifying your actions. How? By blaming your partner: they don't understand you, they are too snippy and argumentative, and they don't love you anymore. When this happens on both sides of the relationship, you are on a fast track to a breakup or divorce.
In order to turn this around, it is going to take a lot of soul-searching and communication. You have to rebuild the trust between the two of you and let your partner know without a doubt that you love them and are willing to take responsibility for your actions. Even if the relationship cannot be completely salvaged, you will at least make the breakup easier on both of you.
The first thing to do is to realize that there was a time when you really loved each other. Think back to how you felt when you first met or first realized that you had romantic feelings for your partner. Try to go back and actually re-experience those feelings. How your heart skipped a beat whenever you saw them or even thought of them. Think of some of the really good times you had together, when you were happy. Realize that at one stage there really was something special between the two of you and it is at least worth trying to salvage the relationship.
Next, really take a look at all the things you did wrong. Don't fall into the trap of blaming your partner for everything, you played a big part in it too, and at this stage you really need to concentrate only on your actions. It would be a great idea to get a sheet of paper and right everything down. The point of this excercise is to release some of the guilt and resentment you feel towards your partner. In order for it to work, you have to come clean - at least to yourself!
Thirdly, write a letter to your love. Explain to them that you are really sorry about the way things turned out and that you realize that you have had a huge part to play in the fact that the relationship turned sour. Talk about how you felt when you first fell in love and remind them of all the great things that have happened to you while you have been together. In order for them to trust your sincerity, however, you are probably going to have to tell them some of the things you have done that you are ashamed of. The important thing is to take responsibility for your actions, let your partner know how how you feel about them and make sure you tell them that you would really like the chance to make it up to them. Invite them on a special date, for just the two of you, so you can sit down together and clear the air, and at the very least, part as friends.
Once you have completed the above, it is really up to the two of you to sit down and discuss things to see if you have a future together. Don't try to rush things, as trust can take time to build again. But, if you at least come clean about how you feel and make an appeal to your partner's heart, you have a better chance of making it than if you didn't.
Secrets of A Blissful Romance
How you live your life determines what kind of love you experience...
by Jennifer Good
If you don't try how will you know?
Remember how precious your loved one is. You never know if today is the last day you'll see them. Don't do something you'd regret if you never got a chance to see them again to make amends.
Being romantic means something different to everyone. To me it means being high spirited, completely carefree in love and willing to take the risk of truly loving someone with all your heart. Meaning: don't let embarrassment or shyness get in the way of showing your affection!
Hope is the motto for a romantic. Even if things don't work out perfectly today, who says it won't when the time is right? Don't give up without a worthy fight!
Love the one you're with. Why compromise what could possibly be a great relationship by not focusing on who you're with now. If you're not happy with it, leave. Otherwise, give your partner 100%. You'll find your attention will not go unreturned!
"Within our dreams and aspirations we find our opportunities." -Sue Atchley Ebaugh
What is the ideal relationship to you? Write it down as specifically as you can. Decide to make your relationship as close to this model as possible. Whenever you feel the relationship falling, pull out that paper and remind yourself what you need to do to get it to your ideal state.
Remember, you are your own best counsel. Practice doing what you know is best for you today. By second guessing yourself, you're making yourself your own worst enemy.
Be the best you can be. If you don't think you're good at something, practice until you are! If this involves the subject of romance, learn as much as you can about being romantic and then DO those things! There is no excuse for not knowing OR doing!
Ponder the words of Torquato Tasso, "Any time not spent in love is wasted."
"People tend to question when you start something and worry about the ending; they forget that its the middle that counts the most."
Know who you are. Take the time to write down who you are and what you like. Don't write down what you'd like to be or who you think other people want you to be... only who you actually are. I think that in today's world a lot of people forget to just be themselves and be okay with it. So, today be okay with who you are!
Enjoy life! For one day, smile wherever you go. Pick flowers on the roadside. Instead of arguing, kiss and make up. Do something spontaneous. What's the point of working so hard if you don't take at least a few minutes to really enjoy it?
Sometimes... a heart can not afford to be... just friends!
Be there for your love, emotionally and physically (if possible). The comfort and bond you feel with someone you know is just there for you, can not be matched. So, leave a note or take a few moments out of your day to let your sweetheart or other loved one know that you are there for them.
"Love is like evergreens; they go through the roughest times but never fade."
Love isn't a one way street. It is something that needs to be maintained. If you find yourself falling out of love it's not because it doesn't exist between you anymore. It is because it isn't being created anymore. Make the time to follow the definition of romance. Make your partner feel loved!
"How long does youth last? So long as we are loved." -from the The Golden Book of Countess Diana
Sometimes we forget how valuable our significant other is. We get caught up in our day to day lives and our relationships end up suffering. Make some time to let your partner know how much you appreciate them being in your life. Even if it's just a quick note!
"To handle yourself, use your head; to handle others, use your heart." Remember, before you react to any situation think with your heart first. Really try to understand the motivation behind the other person's behavior. More often than not, there is some other situation you are unaware of that has prompted an attack. Try this tip and watch how upsets in your daily life decrease!
"Love cannot grow without passion." -Greek Proverb
"It takes two to make a marriage a success and only one a failure." -Herbert Louis Samuel
by Jennifer Good
If you don't try how will you know?
Remember how precious your loved one is. You never know if today is the last day you'll see them. Don't do something you'd regret if you never got a chance to see them again to make amends.
Being romantic means something different to everyone. To me it means being high spirited, completely carefree in love and willing to take the risk of truly loving someone with all your heart. Meaning: don't let embarrassment or shyness get in the way of showing your affection!
Hope is the motto for a romantic. Even if things don't work out perfectly today, who says it won't when the time is right? Don't give up without a worthy fight!
Love the one you're with. Why compromise what could possibly be a great relationship by not focusing on who you're with now. If you're not happy with it, leave. Otherwise, give your partner 100%. You'll find your attention will not go unreturned!
"Within our dreams and aspirations we find our opportunities." -Sue Atchley Ebaugh
What is the ideal relationship to you? Write it down as specifically as you can. Decide to make your relationship as close to this model as possible. Whenever you feel the relationship falling, pull out that paper and remind yourself what you need to do to get it to your ideal state.
Remember, you are your own best counsel. Practice doing what you know is best for you today. By second guessing yourself, you're making yourself your own worst enemy.
Be the best you can be. If you don't think you're good at something, practice until you are! If this involves the subject of romance, learn as much as you can about being romantic and then DO those things! There is no excuse for not knowing OR doing!
Ponder the words of Torquato Tasso, "Any time not spent in love is wasted."
"People tend to question when you start something and worry about the ending; they forget that its the middle that counts the most."
Know who you are. Take the time to write down who you are and what you like. Don't write down what you'd like to be or who you think other people want you to be... only who you actually are. I think that in today's world a lot of people forget to just be themselves and be okay with it. So, today be okay with who you are!
Enjoy life! For one day, smile wherever you go. Pick flowers on the roadside. Instead of arguing, kiss and make up. Do something spontaneous. What's the point of working so hard if you don't take at least a few minutes to really enjoy it?
Sometimes... a heart can not afford to be... just friends!
Be there for your love, emotionally and physically (if possible). The comfort and bond you feel with someone you know is just there for you, can not be matched. So, leave a note or take a few moments out of your day to let your sweetheart or other loved one know that you are there for them.
"Love is like evergreens; they go through the roughest times but never fade."
Love isn't a one way street. It is something that needs to be maintained. If you find yourself falling out of love it's not because it doesn't exist between you anymore. It is because it isn't being created anymore. Make the time to follow the definition of romance. Make your partner feel loved!
"How long does youth last? So long as we are loved." -from the The Golden Book of Countess Diana
Sometimes we forget how valuable our significant other is. We get caught up in our day to day lives and our relationships end up suffering. Make some time to let your partner know how much you appreciate them being in your life. Even if it's just a quick note!
"To handle yourself, use your head; to handle others, use your heart." Remember, before you react to any situation think with your heart first. Really try to understand the motivation behind the other person's behavior. More often than not, there is some other situation you are unaware of that has prompted an attack. Try this tip and watch how upsets in your daily life decrease!
"Love cannot grow without passion." -Greek Proverb
"It takes two to make a marriage a success and only one a failure." -Herbert Louis Samuel
7 Secrets of a Successful Marriage
1. Be each other's support system.
You go through many things in a lifetime. It helps to know there is someone to help you shoulder the hard times. When your partner comes to you or needs an encouraging word, give it to them. Your vote of confidence can do wonders for your partner and in turn better your relationship.
2. Be able to compromise.
By now we should all agree that people can't always have their own way. Applying the art of compromise is a healthy solution to settling a disagreement. Be willing to look for new avenues for exchange in order to make things feel fair to your partner. You might try a back rub in exchange for dish washing duty or quiet time together in exchange for a guy's night out. Compromising can help you turn your differences into new ways to discover each other.
3. Express your love in a variety of ways.
Don't just say it; show it. Don't just show it; say it. In other words, find more than one way to express your affection for your partner. Variety is the spice that keeps a marriage together. Leave a love note under your partner's pillow. Write "I love you" in lipstick on the mirror. Hide a rose on your partner's car seat. Stop and give your partner a very unexpected weak-in-the-knees kiss. Mail a hand-written love letter. Avoid falling into a boredom rut by continually striving to try and do new things together.
4. Respect each other's individuality.
Encourage your partner to participate in individual interests they may have. In fact, take that encouragement a step further and occasionally join your partner in their favorite past time. You'll be showing your partner that you not only understand who they are, but that you love them exactly how they are as well.
5. Always leave on good terms.
Life is unexpected. No argument is worth parting ways while upset with each other. If you can keep this in mind, it will go a long way to helping you put certain aspects of your relationship in perspective. Learn to value your relationship enough to never let things get that out of hand.
6. Be kind and considerate to each other.
This may seem like a given, but how many times have you snapped at your partner under stress, or made an unnecessary remark? Words and the tone in which they're used leave a lasting imprint. You can use this to make your couple memories something you will happily look back upon…or not. Long-term married couples make kindness and respect toward their partner a crucial part of their daily lives.
7. Exploit each other strengths, not weaknesses.
Think of yourselves as a team. Together you are going to try and accomplish many things from buying a house, bettering your careers, raising children and more. If you spend your time nit-picking each other about what you're doing wrong, you're wasting valuable effort that could be put towards making your dreams come true. If you were to encourage a group of employees, you wouldn't tell them how horrible they are doing. You would start with positive, motivating statements. Learn to incorporate this towards each other. Find where each other's strengths are and use them to your ability. One of you may be a more sales type personality, the other the organizer. Find out where you fit and how you can use those traits to better your team of husband and wife.
You go through many things in a lifetime. It helps to know there is someone to help you shoulder the hard times. When your partner comes to you or needs an encouraging word, give it to them. Your vote of confidence can do wonders for your partner and in turn better your relationship.
2. Be able to compromise.
By now we should all agree that people can't always have their own way. Applying the art of compromise is a healthy solution to settling a disagreement. Be willing to look for new avenues for exchange in order to make things feel fair to your partner. You might try a back rub in exchange for dish washing duty or quiet time together in exchange for a guy's night out. Compromising can help you turn your differences into new ways to discover each other.
3. Express your love in a variety of ways.
Don't just say it; show it. Don't just show it; say it. In other words, find more than one way to express your affection for your partner. Variety is the spice that keeps a marriage together. Leave a love note under your partner's pillow. Write "I love you" in lipstick on the mirror. Hide a rose on your partner's car seat. Stop and give your partner a very unexpected weak-in-the-knees kiss. Mail a hand-written love letter. Avoid falling into a boredom rut by continually striving to try and do new things together.
4. Respect each other's individuality.
Encourage your partner to participate in individual interests they may have. In fact, take that encouragement a step further and occasionally join your partner in their favorite past time. You'll be showing your partner that you not only understand who they are, but that you love them exactly how they are as well.
5. Always leave on good terms.
Life is unexpected. No argument is worth parting ways while upset with each other. If you can keep this in mind, it will go a long way to helping you put certain aspects of your relationship in perspective. Learn to value your relationship enough to never let things get that out of hand.
6. Be kind and considerate to each other.
This may seem like a given, but how many times have you snapped at your partner under stress, or made an unnecessary remark? Words and the tone in which they're used leave a lasting imprint. You can use this to make your couple memories something you will happily look back upon…or not. Long-term married couples make kindness and respect toward their partner a crucial part of their daily lives.
7. Exploit each other strengths, not weaknesses.
Think of yourselves as a team. Together you are going to try and accomplish many things from buying a house, bettering your careers, raising children and more. If you spend your time nit-picking each other about what you're doing wrong, you're wasting valuable effort that could be put towards making your dreams come true. If you were to encourage a group of employees, you wouldn't tell them how horrible they are doing. You would start with positive, motivating statements. Learn to incorporate this towards each other. Find where each other's strengths are and use them to your ability. One of you may be a more sales type personality, the other the organizer. Find out where you fit and how you can use those traits to better your team of husband and wife.
Wednesday, March 04, 2009
Why should the wedding ring be worn on the fourth finger?
Thumb represents your Parents
Second(Index) finger represents your Siblings
Middle finger represents your-Self
Fourth(Ring) finger represents your Life Partner & the
Last(Little) finger represents your children
Firstly, open your palms (face to face), bend the middle fingers and hold them together - back to back
Secondly, open and hold the remaining three fingers and the thumb - tip to tip
Now, try to separate your thumbs (representing the parents)..., they will open, because your parents are not destined to live with you lifelong, and have to leave you sooner or later.
Please join your thumbs as before and separate your Index fingers (representing siblings)...., they will also open, because your brothers and sisters will have their own families and will have to lead their own separate lives.
Now join the Index fingers and separate your Little fingers (representing your children)...., they will open too, because the children also will get married and settle down on their own some day.
Finally, join your Little fingers, and try to separate your Ring fingers (representing your spouse). You will be surprised to see that you just CANNOT....., because Husband & Wife have to remain together all their lives - through thick and thin!!
Second(Index) finger represents your Siblings
Middle finger represents your-Self
Fourth(Ring) finger represents your Life Partner & the
Last(Little) finger represents your children
Firstly, open your palms (face to face), bend the middle fingers and hold them together - back to back
Secondly, open and hold the remaining three fingers and the thumb - tip to tip
Now, try to separate your thumbs (representing the parents)..., they will open, because your parents are not destined to live with you lifelong, and have to leave you sooner or later.
Please join your thumbs as before and separate your Index fingers (representing siblings)...., they will also open, because your brothers and sisters will have their own families and will have to lead their own separate lives.
Now join the Index fingers and separate your Little fingers (representing your children)...., they will open too, because the children also will get married and settle down on their own some day.
Finally, join your Little fingers, and try to separate your Ring fingers (representing your spouse). You will be surprised to see that you just CANNOT....., because Husband & Wife have to remain together all their lives - through thick and thin!!
RULES OF GUYS FOR WOMEN
At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down. Finally, the guys' side of the story. (I must admit, it's pretty good. ) We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side
1. Men ARE not mind readers.
2. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
3. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.
4. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.
5. Crying is blackmail.
6. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!
7. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every question.
8. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
9. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
10. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
11. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us to act like soap opera guys.
12. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
13. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one ..
14. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
15. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
16. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
17. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not! A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
18. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
19. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
20. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.
21. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is fine...Really.
22. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
23. You have enough clothes.
24. You have too many shoes.
25. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
1. Men ARE not mind readers.
2. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
3. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.
4. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.
5. Crying is blackmail.
6. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!
7. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every question.
8. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
9. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
10. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
11. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us to act like soap opera guys.
12. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
13. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one ..
14. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
15. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
16. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
17. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not! A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
18. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
19. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
20. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.
21. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is fine...Really.
22. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
23. You have enough clothes.
24. You have too many shoes.
25. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
The 7 Killer Dating Mistakes
In your search for a great relationship, you shouldn’t just leave things to luck. There are many things that you can do that can enhance your dating experience. Unfortunately, though, there are also an awful lot of things that you can do to make sure that you’re a dating flop.
The following are the most common mistakes made by daters. Take the time to read and learn them so that you won’t make these mistakes too.
• The False Front – though it is important to look good when you’re dating, remember that you should always be realistic. If you do meet someone you like, you will be seeing that person a lot. In that case, you won’t be spending several hours getting ready every time. There is a difference between looking nice, and setting your date up for disillusionment. When you get ready, remember to be yourself. Look your best, look good, but make sure that it’s you in there! No false fronts.
• Availability – when you’re dating, it’s important to make yourself available when you find someone you like. After all, you’ve gone to an awful lot of effort to find a person who may qualify for a relationship. That person won’t stick around forever if you don’t put in some effort.
• Realistic Fun – relationships are often a lot of fun when they first get started. Everything is so fresh, exciting, and new. However, it doesn’t take long to discover that fun can only go so far. Make sure that you have other things in common, such as goals and values, if you want something long-term. Other than fun, you need to keep your eyes open for companionship, respect, love, and commitment. With those characteristics, you’re bound to have fun and a great relationship.
• Perfectionism – we all have our own fantasies about the right person. After building up this fictional Mr. or Ms. Right for so long, it can be hard to let a real person in. After all, real people are flawed. There is nothing wrong with having a dream. Just don’t let your dream block out a perfectly good person for a great relationship. Remember that it is our quirks and idiosyncrasies that make us special. Instead of rejecting them, treasure them when they come in a great person.
• Immediacy – a relationship isn’t something that happens instantly. Though you may want a relationship immediately, unless you give it time to grow, you’ll only be disappointed. Give yourself the opportunity to meet people, get to know people, like people, and find the right person. By rushing into a relationship, you’re setting up for a fall.
• Needs – though love is very important in a relationship, there is a lot more to it than just one emotion. The Beatles song “All You Need is Love” is sweet, but isn’t the key to a long-term relationship. You (and your partner) have many needs, and they all need to be met for things to work. Love is only one of those needs. You also need to remember responsibility, appreciation, trust, intimacy, and many other important factors.
• Time – one of the hardest things to admit to yourself is that a person you’ve been seeing for a long time isn’t the person for you. You may have known it from the start of the relationship, but didn’t want to hurt any feelings. The thing is, the longer you wait, the harder it will be. While you’re dating, you’re testing out different people to find the right one for you. If you discover that you’re with the wrong person, the best thing you can do is stop. It’s only fair to yourself and to your partner.
By avoiding these most common mistakes, you’ll be much more certain to have a happy relationship. It will meet your needs and those of your partner. It will also last much longer, and through many more obstacles. Happy dating.
The following are the most common mistakes made by daters. Take the time to read and learn them so that you won’t make these mistakes too.
• The False Front – though it is important to look good when you’re dating, remember that you should always be realistic. If you do meet someone you like, you will be seeing that person a lot. In that case, you won’t be spending several hours getting ready every time. There is a difference between looking nice, and setting your date up for disillusionment. When you get ready, remember to be yourself. Look your best, look good, but make sure that it’s you in there! No false fronts.
• Availability – when you’re dating, it’s important to make yourself available when you find someone you like. After all, you’ve gone to an awful lot of effort to find a person who may qualify for a relationship. That person won’t stick around forever if you don’t put in some effort.
• Realistic Fun – relationships are often a lot of fun when they first get started. Everything is so fresh, exciting, and new. However, it doesn’t take long to discover that fun can only go so far. Make sure that you have other things in common, such as goals and values, if you want something long-term. Other than fun, you need to keep your eyes open for companionship, respect, love, and commitment. With those characteristics, you’re bound to have fun and a great relationship.
• Perfectionism – we all have our own fantasies about the right person. After building up this fictional Mr. or Ms. Right for so long, it can be hard to let a real person in. After all, real people are flawed. There is nothing wrong with having a dream. Just don’t let your dream block out a perfectly good person for a great relationship. Remember that it is our quirks and idiosyncrasies that make us special. Instead of rejecting them, treasure them when they come in a great person.
• Immediacy – a relationship isn’t something that happens instantly. Though you may want a relationship immediately, unless you give it time to grow, you’ll only be disappointed. Give yourself the opportunity to meet people, get to know people, like people, and find the right person. By rushing into a relationship, you’re setting up for a fall.
• Needs – though love is very important in a relationship, there is a lot more to it than just one emotion. The Beatles song “All You Need is Love” is sweet, but isn’t the key to a long-term relationship. You (and your partner) have many needs, and they all need to be met for things to work. Love is only one of those needs. You also need to remember responsibility, appreciation, trust, intimacy, and many other important factors.
• Time – one of the hardest things to admit to yourself is that a person you’ve been seeing for a long time isn’t the person for you. You may have known it from the start of the relationship, but didn’t want to hurt any feelings. The thing is, the longer you wait, the harder it will be. While you’re dating, you’re testing out different people to find the right one for you. If you discover that you’re with the wrong person, the best thing you can do is stop. It’s only fair to yourself and to your partner.
By avoiding these most common mistakes, you’ll be much more certain to have a happy relationship. It will meet your needs and those of your partner. It will also last much longer, and through many more obstacles. Happy dating.
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