When you take too long, you're slow.
When your boss takes too long, he's thorough.
When you don't get it done, you're lazy.
When your boss doesn't get it done, he's too busy.
When you make mistakes, you're an idiot.
When your boss makes mistakes, he's only human.
When you do something without being told, you're overstepping your authority.
When your boss does the exact same thing, that's initiative.
When you take a stand, you're being pig-headed and stubborn.
When your boss takes a stand, he's being firm.
When you overlook a rule of etiquette, you're being rude.
When your boss skips a few rules, he's being original.
When you please your boss, you're "ars-kissing".
When your boss pleases his boss, he's being co-operative.
When you're out of the office, you're wasting time.
When your boss is out of the office, he's on business.
When you're on a day off sick, you must be lying.
When your boss has a day off sick, he must be very ill.
When you apply for leave, you must be going for an interview.
When your boss applies for leave, it's because he's overworked.
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